Renewed hopes, and a little selfish smile

And then.. she decided to smile again. But this time, it was different. She smiled, not because her parents liked it when she smiled, not because her boyfriend thought she looked pretty smiling, not to make a lot of friends. She smiled, but this time, for herself. She smiled…. because she realized that she, like everyone else deserves to be happy.

She looked at those people who hurt her in the eyes, but this time, not with the feeling of anger or hatred or vengeance or anxiety. She looked at them, smiled to herself and felt relieved. Relieved thinking how she was happier now, – now she was open to positivity. The days where she locked down her own happiness for the happiness of others was gone. Because she didn’t have to please them anymore, neither did she have to hate them. She had moved on, and now she looked at them and smiled, in her heart, she told them, ‘Thank you’.

She thought about those scars left on her, – on her body, on her heart, on her soul. She remembered how she looked at them before, and felt the pain every time, every day. But now, the pain had healed and all she felt now was a breath of fresh air.

Now, she was free. She no longer had those pent-up emotions. She no longer felt sad or alone. She felt free, she felt happier. She realized that she had much more going on for her than she believed she had. She went back home to her dog wagging her tail at her, and her family sharing a laugh together, and somehow she couldn’t stop her tears. But those weren’t the sad tears she cried of loneliness, it was happy tears. The tears of hopes being renewed and positivity being bestowed. The tears were of happiness. And she was no longer scared of loneliness.  She, was now, happy. She was smiling, and this time, it was for herself.

Pratiksha Rajopadhyaya

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One thought on “Renewed hopes, and a little selfish smile

  1. I love reading it.. it just inspires to love oneself without comparing and insecurities.. Hope to read more of it so that I can look forward to smile and believe in me once again….

    Like

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